There have been so many times in my
life when I have had that feeling inside. You know that feeling that won’t go
away. That feeling that is telling you to do something that you’re not sure you
want to do. It’s like it comes from the heart, but your mind……well your fear
filled mind says, “NOOOO!!” Now if you are wondering, when I say move……I don’t
mean ‘move’ literally, at least not right now. You see this week, well this
week, for one, was A…….MAZING! I have spent the last week up in the foot hills
of the Blue Ridge Mountains in Lynchburg, VA. I came here for an intensive
course that was required for the Marriage and Family Therapy degree I am
working towards through Liberty University….or was working towards; well let’s
just say that hasn’t quite been decided yet.
I came
here with high expectations, and they were met, actually I’d say that’s an
understatement. He really hit it out of the park this week. Yes, the God that
never fails to surprise me surprised me again. Honestly, I was on a journey
here to get my three credit hours, meet some good people (maybe even network),
learn a little about Christian counseling while visiting what I expected was a
beautiful campus, and then go home. Man…..was I off! Although, I do expect that
I will get my three credit hours, I didn’t meet any good people. No, I met some
awesome people. People that love God as much as I do (if not more), and were
just as willing (as He is) to share that love with me. I didn’t learn a lot
about Christian counseling. I learned a lot about letting Christ counsel
through me. I learned how to shut up and listen, and learned that I cannot fix
everything…….and don’t need to.
I had
the opportunity to play the counselor, and the counselee. It was amazing to see
the Spirit move in so many people, including myself. Because we were working in
two groups, I had to come up with two ‘problems’ that my counselors could counsel
me on. One was based on a feeling that I have had for a while regarding my current
job, and the other dealt with an urge I had got when I first got here at the
beginning of the week. When I got here, I knew that I couldn’t pass up an
opportunity to run (ok, walk) around this beautiful campus. On one of the first
occasions I really felt at peace here, and imagined all of the perks to living
near campus. I thought that it was definitely an option to consider. However, I
don’t think that He did. That evening I prayed about it, and even sent a
message to my Lifegroup asking them to pray that He would give me guidance and
discernment. That next morning (of course) I started my morning off with the
following devotional:
“You are my beloved child. I chose you before the foundation of the
world, to walk with Me along paths designed uniquely for you. Concentrate
on keeping in step with Me, instead of trying to anticipate My plans for you.
If you trust that My plans are to prosper
you and not to harm you, you can relax and enjoy the present moment.
Your hope and your future are
rooted in heaven, where eternal ecstasy awaits you. Nothing can rob you of your
inheritance of unimaginable riches and well-being. Sometimes I grant you
glimpses of your glorious future, to encourage you and spur you on. But your
main focus should be staying close to Me. I set the pace in keeping with your
needs and My purposes.”
In other words, I think he was saying “whoa, slow down there
fella! I’ve got way too much for you back home.” But it didn’t seem to stop
there. For some reason, several of these people that I was starting to get to
know, started to put other ideas in my head. Not entirely different from the
ideas that I had already had, just a slightly different direction. As I mentioned,
I am currently working towards a degree in Marriage and Family Therapy. And I, without
a doubt, believe that that is my calling. However, I don’t know that it
actually looks the way I thought it did. You see I started this journey with a
class at my church called ‘Chazown’ where I discovered the following statement
about my calling. I am to “Pastor men to be the fathers and husbands that they
were called to be, and Pastor women to be the mothers and wives that they were
called to be, through counseling and encouragement.” Did you notice the capitalized
words in that sentence? Yeah, well that is the word that I kept hearing being
thrown my way this week. So am I going to move, well let’s just say I’m going
to do something about it. Luckily a pastoral counseling degree does not differ
too much from what I have already completed. So, for me my next step is to see
what that may look like for me. I have to look at my options, and what that may
mean for my current working situation……I may just kill two birds with one stone
(solving both of this weeks ‘problems’). Up to this point I have always
considered marriage and family to be my ministry, but now as I am finding, it
may actually be a MINISTRY.
Well, I’ve
pretty much covered when we should move…..when God says to. In this particular
case, he has told me that my direction is slightly different than I had
originally thought. And I bring this to you (hoping that SOMEONE has actually
read it) in hopes that you can help me stay on track, and keep me accountable
to this new vision. What exactly does that vision entail, I am not quite sure
yet. But please don’t let me stop pursuing it, unless of course He tells me
otherwise.
Sometimes
His demands on us may look a little different. They are not always life
changing, course shifting demands. But they can be equally important. There
were several people that I met this week, that I seemed to have an immediate
connection with……we shared some notable things in common. Just to keep it
simple, as we shared our stories and made small conversation, pieces of their
stories stuck out. They rang a bell, so to speak. And sometimes when that
happens we may find that we were put in that situation to answer a call. You
can even call it ‘DIVINE APPOINTMENT’. You were supposed to meet that person. Our
Father gave you a key, a key that they lost, and He wants you to give it to
them. In one particular case, it just meant giving someone a book that I had
just finished reading. For me, it was just a book that may be helpful for their
situation. But as they explained, it was a confirmation that they had been
waiting for.
In another situation, the bell had
been rung, but I had missed my opportunity (or so I thought) to share my
thoughts. Class was over and everyone was leaving town. As I ran some errands I
continued to ponder on the situation (or chew on the cud, as my instructor
stated), considering an email, but then as I walked through the bookstore doors…….there
that person stood. I nervously made a silly comment as I walked by; I struggled
with the idea of sharing the thoughts that had been put on my heart. I really felt
that it was something that I needed to do, but I just could not get myself to
do it.
I didn’t want to leave without
giving it a shot. I made another corky statement and we started to talk.
Finally the thought slipped past my tongue. It.was.such.a.relief!!!! I wasn’t
quite sure what that person was going to do with that thought, but it felt good
to finally get it out. It started a good conversation, an emotional one. You
could tell that the Spirit was right there with us the whole time. And as you
can guess, I am so extremely happy that I made the move, that I answered the
call. If I hadn’t there would’ve been a lot of ‘what ifs’ for me and may have
been a lot of ‘unanswered’ for them.
Why do I share this? Because I know
that every single one of you that will read this, and everyone that will not,
is just like me. You get a feeling in your heart, an urge to do or say
something to someone, and you just can’t find the courage to do it. Well this
is me, telling you that you can and you should. I’m not saying that when you
get excited about an attractive person of the opposite sex, you should run over
and throw your arms around them, then run off and get married…….or that because
you suddenly decide that you want to move away to Hawaii (or Lynchburg, VA) you
should. What I’m saying is, check your thoughts against what you know about
God, and if it fits in line with whom He is…..GO FOR IT! This is about those
times when someone you know is down, and you want to pick them up, maybe even
give them a hug. But the thought of doing so, seems awkward or uncomfortable.
Get over yourself. (J)
The cross that Christ carried on his back for you and I was awkward and
uncomfortable, this is nothing. Love one another as He loves us.
